It's Shakespeare's 460th birthday today and thus National Shakespeare Day, where we celebrate the Bard's birth AND his death (while his birth date isn't recorded, his Baptism is recorded as 26th April 1564 - and in those days a baptism took place around three days after a birth. His death is recorded as 23rd April 1616).
I'm a massive fan of Shakespeare's work and I've made many a card and print from his wonderful quotes. But my favourite area is his insults, which may be over 400 years old, but are as alive and colourful as ever. Here are my top six:
1. You ruinous butt - Troilus and Cressida
This is one of our family favourites. We have a big poster of Shakespearean insults in our downstairs bathroom, so our children are well versed in throwing Shakespearean shade as they sit and read it. Hearing this one coming from an eight-year-old is something quite special. 
2. Thou damned and luxurious mountain goat - Henry V
I always enjoy how random this one is. I imagine a mountain goat with a long and flowing beard, perhaps sipping a glass of champagne in a spa.
3. Thou art damned, like an ill-roasted egg - As You Like It
Firstly, who roasts eggs - and what is an ill-roasted egg? What is a well-roasted egg, for that matter? Perhaps a well-roasted egg is a fine snack that we've all been sleeping on the for last 460 years. Shakespeare knew.
4. Go shake your ears - Twelfth Night
This is a great one for that person in your life who spends waaay too much time on social media and keeps talking to you about chemtrails and Bigfoot.
5. He has not so much brain as earwax - Troilus and Cressida
This one is just genuinely blunt. A solid diss from a man who lived four and a half centuries ago.
6. You scullion, you rampallion, you fustilarion - Henry VI, Part II
The earwax insult gets right to the point, but this is Shakespeare at his sesquipedalian best. It's varied. It's obscure. It's probably an insult, but let me just check my dictionary?
These are just my favourites; there are a zillion more. I liked these so much that I made them into a postcard pack and also wall art, which you can buy in my shop if you're as amused by the old-style cusses as I am!
Enjoy!
*Exits, pursued by a bear*
